Running isn't Always Linear: Goals for Grandma's
This week as we talked RDP with our photographer & hype man, Jason Honeycutt, he reminded us that as a team we are redefining what it means to be female athletes in this sport. As individuals we are also redefining who and what we are. For some of us it’s redefining what we thought was possible, for others it's redefining our place as we move into a new phase of our lives as athletes. For me, it’s redefining my confidence.
Over the last year I struggled because my confidence was being drawn from comparing myself to my previous self. It's natural to want to chase new PR's, but running is not always linear. My confidence has to be from within. I have to genuinely believe I can do what I do because every day won't be a success. Every workout won't feel easy. Running beyond my prescribed pace cannot be my basis of worth. Staying the course and believing in myself is the only way I can stand on the start line knowing, "I am a badass and I am ready."
It took the first 4 months of this year to really change my mindset. I have known all along that my confidence was holding me back, but I couldn't shake it. In the first 4 months of this year I felt worse than I ever have. And the battle both mentally and physically was rough. Some days I was positive that I would get everything figured out and I would be stronger than ever on the other side. But other days I felt like I would never be back. Through it all I just kept training. Running is what I love to do and I couldn't imagine not having it. Good or bad I wanted to be out there. I reached a point where I told myself, “I don't care how fast I run, I just want to feel good again.” That mindset helped me when we finally got things figured out.
I embraced the last month and a half of training knowing I was strong, because good or bad I stuck it out and the work was there. I focused on being where I was. Now in the final 24 hours pre-race, I am just happy to be running. Thankful to be chasing a goal. Thankful that my legs are ready to carry me through 26.2 miles. Thankful to be feeling confident. And thankful for my team in Raleigh who got me here. My RDP teammates were there when I felt like I would never rebound. They were there when I let the negative thoughts creep in. And they were there when things turned around.
To everyone else racing out there: enjoy it, stay in the moment, and let's do this!
A Goal: 2:40 and at OTQ
B Goal: Negative Split & OTQ
C Goal: Finish
Oiselle for days
NB 1400v3 Racing Flats fitted with Lock Laces
UCAN Coffee Bean Bars
UCAN Chocolate With Protein
Big Spoon Nut Butter
GF Snacks on snacks